knowyourneighbor

Angels in our Community

"And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of heavenly hosts praising God and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will towards men." Luke 2: 13-14

It’s Christmas Eve, so I thought I’d share highlights and snapshots of this year’s St. Louis Crèches and Carols event, hosted by the St. Louis Missouri stake of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, with the cooperation of other area stakes and community organizations.

Now in its fourth year, Crèches and Carols has blossomed into an annual event that finds common ground, not only amongst Christians, but people of all faiths and traditions.

Because this year’s theme featured a tribute to the angels mentioned in the scriptural account of Christ’s birth (Luke 2:13-14), Patrons were greeted by the heavenly host in the foyer.

Special Partners and Friends Give to the Exhibit

Contributing to the diversity of angels and reflecting the diversity of our community, Lois Conley, founder of the Blackworld History Museum in St. Louis, shared her personal collection of dozens of black angels.

 

Because of Lois Conley’s contribution and that of Latter-day Saint member Janet Rice (pictured above next to the black angel tree), organizers were able to put together a tree with a whole host of black angels.  Black angels were also to be found in the Africa, whimsical, porcelain, and Americana themed displays.

Photo courtesy of Ben Munson

Another contributing friend is a Catholic woman, Yvonne Von Der Ahe (pictured above), who was so taken by the event the first year that she offered to contribute her entire Fontanni collection (pictured behind Yvonne) – an Italian scene depicting not only the nativity, but Bethlehem and all the sights and sounds of a bustling village anticipating the Christ child’s birth.

Yvonne has every Fontanni piece ever made and keeps the scene set up in her basement all year long to remind her of Christ’s sacrifice for her. 

Yvonne demonstrated her commitment to the exhibit when, during the second year of set-up day, she drove up in her mobile home stuffed full of her collection. Yvonne’s collection takes an entire quarter of the gym space.

We kicked off the event by hosting a private tour that welcomes community leaders including dignitaries of government, civic and religious organizations. 

Over 30 community leaders came to this year’s special evening. Nekisha Rhodes and Bryant Brookes (pictured on right) sang a gospel-style version of Silent Night for the guests.

Inviting Friends

In addition to helping the Church to bridge with community leaders, the event helps members to reach out to their neighbors.

Brother and Sister Bankhead brought 15 families to the event. Each year they invite friends and each year the list grows.

They don’t just hand out a flyer for the event and encourage their friends to “go”, rather they invite their friends to come “with” them, inviting them on Sunday evening, because most Christmas parties are not held on Sunday and people are usually free to come.

The Bankheads start the evening with a light dinner, from 4 p.m. to 5 p.m., served appetizer-style in several rooms of their home. They find this makes it easy to serve and mingle and to accommodate more guests than their dining table could seat.

At 5 p.m. they hand each guest a map and an itinerary to explain how the rest of the evening will go. By 5:30 p.m. the group meets at the exhibit to take in the displays and the children’s crafts. At 7 p.m they meet in the chapel to listen to the Christmas message broadcast from leaders of the Church.

Though their large family is so busy and can hardly think of taking the time to do this, they make the commitment, regardless if they feel their home is decorated or perfectly clean and ready to greet people.

Brother Bankhead said, “If we don’t plan it, it just won’t happen. We can always think of a number of excuses, and for our family it just seems so hard to schedule the time.”

The Bankhead family demonstrates that reaching out to others is not something that just happens, but it takes deliberate action. The payback is worth it, so they do it each year.

Brother Bankhead says that the evening opens and re-opens a dialogue each year with his friends about faith. Though one neighbor has expressed interest in reading the Book of Mormon, and another neighbor decided to involve their sons in the church scout program, the experience of bringing their community of friends closer together makes the effort worth it.

Pictured are John Welch and daughter Elena. Photo courtesy of Susan Heimman

The Gift that Keeps on Giving

Each year this event grows. Key to its success has been the involvement of our community friends who offer elements to the event we might otherwise not have if we relied only on our church members’ resources.

This event is our church’s gift to the community, yes, but we receive so much more in return.

Each year I volunteer for hours on end greeting and meeting people in the community. The hours go by quickly and I go away fed by the fellowship of our community. I can’t think of a better way to begin the Christmas season than to open our hearts with our friends and share the common ground of hope for “peace on earth, good will towards men”.

May we keep this spirit throughout the year and forever working with our neighbors and friends.

Whitney and I wish you a very Merry Christmas all year long!

Dana

Peace on Earth, Goodwill to All Men....

A press release appeared at the LDS Newsroom yesterday titled Peace on Earth, Goodwill to All Men -- Not Just Those Who Share My Beliefs.

It appears in its entirety below; all I can add is 'Amen.'

There is a spiritual maturity demonstrated by those who can accept religious common ground with others and also respectfully acknowledge differences. This comes from spending time with each other and by taking an approach that puts a desire to seek mutual understanding and goodwill above pride and self-interest.

Currently, many media and other discussions in the United States and elsewhere are raising questions about what it means to be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and how Mormons fit into neighborhood and national social mosaics. Some of these questions and comments are dispassionate, dignified and thoughtful. However, many others come across either as misguided utterances or as deliberate attacks. The latter type of comment is often underpinned by a tone of expertise and authority that baffles those who know Latter-day Saint beliefs best — Mormons themselves.

Ill-informed comments can be easily forgiven, and chances to engage in discussion to develop mutual, accurate understanding and respect are often seized upon — as they should be. But when a person starts excluding someone of a different faith as a legitimate participant in society because there are theological differences — then a line has been crossed.

It is bewildering to a Mormon to hear or read that some others feel that she or he is not a Christian. To a Mormon, any person who worships, loves and honestly tries to live by the teachings of Jesus Christ, as the Son of God and Savior of Mankind, is a fellow Christian. Theological differences unquestionably exist, but genuine, reverent love for and sincere striving to emulate the Savior qualify any person to call her- or himself a Christian.

Joseph Smith, the Mormons’ first prophet, said: “I want the liberty of thinking and believing as I please. It feels so good not to be trammeled.”

Speaking more recently, Latter-day Saint Apostle, Elder M. Russell Ballard said: “Just as we claim the right to worship as we choose, we believe [others] have the right to worship—or to not worship—as [they] see fit. All of our interpersonal relationships should be built on a foundation of mutual respect, trust, and appreciation. But that shouldn’t prevent us from sharing deeply held religious feelings with each other. Indeed, we may find that our [religious and] philosophical differences add flavor and perspective to our relationships, especially if those relationships are built on true values, openness, respect, trust, and understanding.”

Cynicism and distrust are tainting much of the discussion about faith and values, and their influence on social systems. And this is causing us to miss the opportunity to engage with each other, through media and face to face, on more important issues — such as how we can get along so we can work together to do good in our homes, communities and nations.

Truly effective collaboration, for the good of our families and societies, is not possible until we have the will and the maturity to listen to, understand and respect each other. When the intolerance hurdle has been successfully jumped, all sorts of wonderful things can happen, as individuals rub shoulders while working toward common community objectives.

Muslims, Catholics, Evangelicals, Mormons and many others, working side by side to help rebuild parts of Indonesia after the 2004 tsunami, provided a powerful example of what is possible. Political, ethnic and faith lines were washed away by the flooding as individuals temporarily put aside differences to focus on more pressing, shared imperatives.

During this Christmas season and at all times, a true showing of our depth of devotion and faith will be how we talk about and engage with others — others of our own faith and, even more significant, those who may have some differing religious beliefs. The way we talk and write about others says a lot more about ourselves than it does about those we seek to describe.

What we can learn from Ann Romney

For any of us interested in learning more about how to reach across the aisle, take a moment to read the NY Times article titled The Stay-at-Home Woman Travels Well.

While it is true that Mrs. Romney's search for common ground has been born, at least partially, out of political necessity, there are lessons for us to learn about reaching out.

In the article, reporter Jodi Kantor describes a shrimp dinner gathering for Republican women in South Carolina. Initially both Ms. Kantor and the audience, saw the differences, "she was probably the wealthiest person in the room, and according to the crowd, the prettiest too." But Mrs. Romney focused her speech on the commonalities. She spoke of her children, her battle with multiple sclerosis, while "running lightly over her husband's accomplishments, turning titles into heartwarming stories."

Mrs. Romney's ability to find common ground did not come naturally. According to this article, her inability to do so may have hurt her husband's race for the senate. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if some of the adjectives that were used to describe her at the time, like "unapproachable and isolated", are ones that have been used to describe Mormons.

Which is why I find Mrs. Romney's story encouraging.

Despite her early difficulties, she has been able to find ways to have conversations, to find common ground.

I believe that if she can, so can we.

Related posts/articles:

So why Know Your Neighbor?
Get off the river
Leaven in the lump
Common ground: Dana King's How-To

Elder Ballard on Joining the New Media Conversation

It was hard to miss.

I received three different e-mails, including one from More Good Foundation, telling me about Elder Ballard's talk titled Using New Media to Support the Work of the Church. Quoting from his talk:

"There are conversations going on about the Church constantly. Those conversations will continue whether or not we choose to participate in them. But we cannot stand on the sidelines while others, including our critics, attempt to define what the Church teaches. While some conversations have audiences in the thousands or even millions, most are much, much smaller. But all conversations have an impact on those who participate in them. Perceptions of the Church are established one conversation at a time."

In the context of Know Your Neighbor, there's a paragraph that I earnestly hope will not go unnoticed. It reads:

"As you participate in this conversation and utilize the tools of New Media, remember who you are--Latter-day Saints.

Remember as the Proverb states that “a soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). And remember that “contention is of the devil."

There is no need to argue or contend with others regarding our beliefs. There is no need to become defensive or belligerent..

We simply need to have a conversation, as friends in the same room would have."

What are your thoughts?

Can we have a conversation?

A pineapple gift

When I met with Sara Allen in late October to present her with the KYN/Pineapple award, I learned that Sara and her family give a pineapple to their neighbors every Christmas; their first Christmas in the neighborhood they hand-delivered fifty pineapples with personalized messages.

Courtesy of Peter Finnie, istockphoto

Should you want to give pineapples to your neighbors/friends this holiday season, Sara has been kind enough to share with us the message that accompanies her family's gift of the pineapple.

It has been said that a
Pineapple
is a symbol of
Hospitality and Friendship.
A Pineapple symbolizes
a Warm Welcome to all those
who enter your home.

May you enjoy our
sweet Tradition
of sharing a Pineapple
with someone you love
and welcome into your home
this Christmas season.

Merry Christmas!

Love...The Allen Family
Colby, Sara, Kate, Brooklin
Savanna and Baden

Related posts/articles:

Deck the halls -- with pineapples?
Sara Allen Wins the KYN/Pineapple Award

United for Families

“No other success can compensate for failure in the home.” President David O. McKay

Look at this gathering!

Over 1600 people assembled to celebrate families in St. Louis, Missouri at the Unity Ball hosted by Better Family Life, Inc. celebrating 25 years of strengthening families.  Better Family Life was started in response to the crisis in the African American family.

Pictured L to R are: Nekisha Rhodes and Dana King (members of Lindell ward) and Debbie Lancaster (member of Pagedale ward).

This year I was blessed to attend as a representative of the local congregations (wards/stakes) of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The messages and spirit of the evening were familiar to me.

Malik Ahmed (pictured at the podium in above photo), President of Better Family Life, who believes families are at the core of society, said, “Better families makes a better community.”

And interestingly, alcohol is discouraged by Better Family Life and so it was not served at the dinner. How often do you see a group gathered for a party where there is no drinking involved?  This is outside Utah, mind you!

I felt at home; there was no ‘us and them’, only ‘us united’ for families. 

Nekisha Rhodes, a member of Lindell ward, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, participates in Better Family Life’s programs. She opened the Unity Ball this year by singing the Negro National Anthem, Lift Every Voice and Sing. You can hear her on You Tube.

Sometimes we might feel the world is ganging-up on families, that the odds are against successful families.  It is heartening to know of organizations like Better Family Life Inc. With 9 locations and over 100 staff in the St. Louis area; they are making a difference.

A response to Bob Bennett's comment

Dear Bob,

It was so wonderful to read your comment, and to learn of what you and several other Latter-day Saint families have done to rally around the Parker's and the Wirthlin's. In a talk given by President Kimball to Regional Representatives many years ago, he urged us to act as citizens to support righteous causes. You have indeed done so at a cost to yourself for which I am very grateful; I apologize for the offense that my musing may have caused.

As I reflect on why I had the sense that Mormons hadn't been quite as engaged, it is for the following reason. With the exception of Elizabeth Harmer-Dionne's e-mailing to all those on the Legacy Law Foundation mailing list which mistakenly I did not mention in my prior post (thank you to Tonia Parker for the reminder - the Foundation does good work!), I wouldn't have know about the Parker/Wirthlin case had Elizabeth Harmer-Dionne not informally introduced me to the Wirthlin's.

In other words, even though I live not more than twenty miles from Lexington, people in my ward and stake seem to know little or nothing about their case. Certainly we haven't galvanized ourselves in any formal or en masse way. Myself included, let it be said. This also seemed to be true with marriage amendment as well.

Perhaps I am out of the loop. Entirely possible.

And in so doing I (we as a community) have missed hearing and knowing about some unique and wonderful contributions such as yours, and for that I apologize.

The question -- are we reaching across the aisle remains an important one.

I feel I could do better; I hope other Mormons do too.

With warmest regards,

Whitney Johnson

Evangelicals and Mormons find common ground in Massachusetts

Even as most of the U.S. focuses on our differences, there is a group of Evangelicals and Mormons here in Massachusetts that have found common ground. Out of necessity, but found it, we have.

By way of background, David and Tonia Parker (Evangelical Christian), and Robb and Robin Wirthlin (Mormon) are the courageous parents who sued a Massachusetts school to defend their right as parents to guide their children’s moral education. Their case, which was dismissed by the District Court, will be heard beginning this Wednesday, December 5th by the 1st Circuit Court of Appeals.

As described on their website "this claim was brought by four parents and their very young children against the Town of Lexington, its school board, various administrators and a teacher. The plaintiffs are devout Judeo-Christians. They claim that the defendants have intentionally interfered with their Fourteenth Amendment due process rights to direct the moral upbringing of their own children.

The defendants have begun a campaign of intentionally indoctrinating very young children to affirm the notion that homosexuality is right and moral, in direct denigration of the plaintiffs' deeply-held faith. The plaintiffs tolerate and respect all people but wish to teach their faith to their children at their own pace, and in their own way."

There is so much more to be said.

Such as these families have incurred $300k plus in legal expenses to fight a fight that is also my fight (and possibly yours).

And, in the spirit of Know Your Neighbor, I am grateful that the Coalition for Marriage and Family, largely backed by the Evangelical community, has supported not only the Parkers, one of their own, but also the Wirthlins who are Mormon.

It is tragic that this common ground has come at such a high personal cost for the Parkers and Wirthlins. They have suffered not only financially, but also emotionally, as their young children have been scorned and shunned because of what they believe.

But, I am so very grateful.

For the common ground.

For the courage and endurance of these families.

And especially for the Evangelical community here in Massachusetts.

May God pour out his blessings upon them.

When did you or I last support someone who wasn't one of our own?

While I could be inaccurate, I have the sense that the Evangelicals have been much more proactive in supporting the Parkers and the Wirthlins than have the Mormons. Assuming that my impression is accurate, why do you think this is? Is this acceptable?

If you would like to pray for these families and help defray their legal expenses, what a wonderful way to Know Your Neighbor this Christmas season.