knowyourneighbor

On the back porch until September

Dear neighbors in faraway places -- 

It's mid-August, and we're going to spend some time visiting with our nearby neighbors.

Talk to you in September!

Our best,

Dana and Whitney

Dancing to common ground

"Mom, who's your favorite contestant on So You Think You Can Dance?" my 11-year old asked.

"Chelsie."

"You always like the Mormon contestants:  Chelsie, Brooke (White), David (Archuleta), Lacey (Schimmer), Benji (Schwimmer).

Don't you think you're showing too much bias toward the Mormons?"

I wanted to say, tried to say, "No, I'm not."

But I couldn't.

Because he was right.

I am biased.

Which tells me just how much my identity is wrapped up in my Mormon-ness; if a Mormon contestant does well, somehow I do too.

It was also a gentle reminder that stepping outside of my religion to find common ground is not so easy.   Put more specifically, for me, or anyone, whose identity is tied up in our gender, race, religion, ethnicity, if we meet two people -- and we share a religion -- who will we befriend?

We are drawn to people like us.

It's human nature.

But isn't everyone ultimately like us?

Maybe we have to just look a little harder.

In addition to your Mormon-ness, what are your other identities?  How can you find common ground by tapping into these identities?

NY Times "Won't you Be My Neighbor?"

You absolutely must read Peter Lovenheim's article titled Won't You Be My Neighbor?

Here's an excerpt:

Our political leaders speak of crossing party lines to achieve greater unity. Maybe we should all cross the invisible lines between our homes and achieve greater unity in the places we live. Probably we don’t need to sleep over; all it might take is to make a phone call, send a note, or ring a bell. Why not try it today?

P.S.  Shout out to Whitney Clayton for passing this along.

30th anniversary brings us to the Welcome Table

I hope you have been tuned-in to the 30th anniversary of the priesthood being extended to every worthy male member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

In case you have missed it, see the film that was produced for the celebration - click here. Sister Catherine Stokes introduces us to the concept of the Welcome Table.

In the spirit of the Welcome Table, who can you invite into your home who may be different from your background?

How can you and your family, ward quorum or auxiliary expand the Welcome Table?

Related link: My Friend Nekisha

See news stories surrounding the celebration: click here.

I hope you have the opportunity to catch the celebration broadcast on BYU television -- see schedule

Conversation with Rabbi Irwin Kula

This past week, Elder Clayton Christensen and I met with Rabbi Irwin Kula, the president of the National Jewish Center for Learning and Leadership.

There were several interesting takeaways:

1)  Rabbi Kula sought out Elder Christensen because of his disruptive innovation frameworks, and became more intrigued, not less, when he learned about Professor Christensen's spiritual beliefs and conviction.  In my Boston Globe op-ed I observed that we (members of the Mormon church) don't seem to marry our secular and spiritual lives very well.  Elder Christensen is an exception; Rabbi Kula didn't have to dig too hard to know that this business school professor gladly and eagerly invites all who will into his spiritual life.

2)  Rabbi Kula's commitment to common ground is compelling, and worth modeling. When he approached Elder Christensen, rather than saying "I am a non-congregational eighth generation rabbi and you are a committed Mormon, there is very little to discuss", he instead said:

I am a non-congregational eighth generation rabbi, and you are a committed Mormon, may I share with you some of the things about which I believe we'd have a shared sensibility?

In both our traditions there is the importance of learning from everyone, the reduced emphasis on professional clergy, the centrality of community as a context for spiritual/moral development and most significantly for service to those more vulnerable, the prominence of...practice that gives credibility to belief, the weight given to discipline and actions...all of these issues are taken seriously by both our traditions.

3)  As our discussion wound down, I found myself wondering, what if our society, and Mormons in particular, were more eager to seek out common ground.  

First, an example from pop culture.  Then another, a bit more serious, example.

I've heard anecdotally that there were many Utahns who voted against David Archuleta because he was Mormon.  Not to take away from David Cook; he is phenomenal.  But don't people usually want to vote for the hometown kid?  In this instance, what divided may have been more important than what unites... If that's the case, how did we get to the point where there is such a rift between Mormons and non-Mormons in Utah?  And what can we do to mend it? 

Then there's the question of the role that religion plays in our country.  In the St. Louis Post-Dispatch's inaugural post on its Civil Religion blog, Tim Townsend writes "Rousseau coined the term civil religion to describe the necessary basics of belief that keep a civilization together."  Does our society (and do we as Mormons specifically) focus on these basic beliefs, or the particularities that divide us?  If so, what of our nation's well-being over the long-term?

What can we learn from Elder Christensen?  From Rabbi Kula?

When was the last time you actively sought out common ground?

P.S.  After re-reading my op-ed, would you say that David Archuleta and Brooke White are meeting the criteria for representing Mormons as we would like to be represented?  Yes, I know it's American Idol, and not president of the U.S.  But there were 100 million votes tallied in the finale :) 

SLC's Millcreek Neighbors Celebrate Tolerance

Because Knowing our Neighbor can have a very different dynamic outside the Mormon corridor (e.g. St. Louis and Boston where Dana and I respectively live), we are delighted to feature the thoughts of Christine Balderas who lives inside the Mormon Corridor.

Christine was one of the organizers of Salt Lake City's 'Bridging the Divide' dialogues several years back (full bio is below). As a prelude to her guest postings, below is a reprint of an op-ed piece Christine wrote several years back for the Salt Lake Tribune.

Happily, it could have been written yesterday.

Source: Rene Mansi, iStockphoto

The Salt Lake Tribune
Date: 05/19/2001 Edition: Final Section: Daybreak Page: C3
Keywords: Between Heaven & Earth Column

Millcreek Neighbors Celebrate Tolerance
BY CHRISTINE W. BALDERAS SPECIAL TO THE TRIBUNE
As Utahns, we share many characteristics and life goals, but rather than celebrate our commonality, we often tend to focus more on what separates us.

Religious affiliation is a common excuse that seems to divide our community. Neighbors and acquaintances often use the excuse that they are either too involved with their own church activities to get to know each other or that they really have nothing in common with their neighbors, so why try.

Fear of others' ulterior motives often hampers sustained relationships in some neighborhoods.

But not in my neighborhood!

Not on my street!

I live on a religiously tolerant street. We enjoy being together -- not because we all think or believe the same, but because we all grow from each other's strengths and ideas. Whether at neighborhood ice cream socials, children's street plays, caroling parties, summer camping trips, Christmas service projects, Sunday evening gab-fests, or in times of grief or celebration, we truly care about each other.

Taboo areas, regarding religious discussion or participation, are almost nonexistent. When my Catholic neighbor's son had his first communion, almost the entire street attended the celebration, including our neighbor and local LDS ward bishop, who excused himself from sacrament meeting to attend the Mass. Lutheran, Latter-day Saint, Presbyterian, Episcopalian and Catholic all sang and rejoiced together....

...At the invitation of her Presbyterian next-door neighbor, a young LDS girl attended summer Bible classes at her church. Neighbors on the street, regardless of denomination, enjoy the Buffalo Barbecue Scouting fund-raiser sponsored by the nearby Methodist church. Supporting each other's activities is pretty routine stuff...

...An appreciation of each other's beliefs is gained by putting aside fears and forging into unknown territory. Once that territory is explored, it just isn't scary anymore.

Source: Steven Robertson, istockphoto

Likewise, our neighbors, who aren't Mormon, support LDS Church social events, baptisms, children's Primary programs, and missionary farewells and homecomings -- even contributing money and writing letters to missionaries...Our Catholic neighbor is also our street coordinator. She organizes activities, collects money for bereavement gifts and takes monthly goodies to widowers on the street.

My Episcopal neighbor contributes money regularly to our LDS ward Relief Society, after women on the street gave round-the-clock care to his wife while he was in the hospital recovering from a heart attack.

My neighbor, when hearing that a fellow Catholic Church member was thinking of leaving the state because of feelings of religious exclusion, suggested it is a two-way street.

"We have to be willing to go the extra mile, too," my neighbor said.

On one occasion when a Latter-day Saint child made an inappropriate remark about a neighbor's religion, it was shrugged off.

"You should hear the comments that are made in my church," the neighbor said. Insult forgotten and relationships sustained.

Do we disagree on issues? Yes!

Do we say or hear hurtful things? Sometimes.

Do we let it fester and destroy our Heaven on Earth relationships with our neighbors? Never!

It just isn't worth the price. It takes a great deal of effort and loving tolerance, but it is worth it. Both adults and children on our street care immensely about each other and by so doing, we have grown to appreciate and love our differences.

It is nice to come home.
-----
Christine W. Balderas lives in the Canyon Rim/East Millcreek neighborhood.

Christine is deeply involved in community building work. On the organizing committee of Salt Lake City’s “Bridging the Religious Divide” dialogues, she saw the transformation that happens when people engage with others across culture and religion. She is on the board of the Salt Lake Center for Engaging Community and it’s subcommittee, “Creating a Culture of Connection”.

Her passion is bringing people together. After stories appeared in both local papers about her street’s cohesiveness, she began working with a group of dedicated women, from varied backgrounds, in her community. The Canyon Rim Community Connection was created. The goal of this organization is to bring neighbors together in various activities, including social, service and dialogue opportunities.

An elementary school teacher, gardening business owner and seminar presenter, Christine began SHARE Parent of Utah to help families who have experienced infant death.

She lives in the foothills of Salt Lake with her husband Dan. They have four married children and eight grandchildren.

Mourning Krister Stendahl; Respect for Diversity of Faiths

In the LDS church's press release respecting the diversity of faiths, it is fitting to have included a quote from Krister Stendahl, former dean of the Harvard Divinity School, Lutheran Bishop of Stockholm, advocate for inter-faith relations, and a good friend of the Mormon church whose commentary can be seen and heard in a video clip from Between Heaven and Earth.

The press release is reprinted below:

SALT LAKE CITY 18 April 2008 A respect for the diverse beliefs and unique contributions of all the world’s faiths is one of the hallmarks of Mormonism. From the earliest days of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Joseph Smith elevated the principle of religious liberty and tolerance: “We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may” (Articles of Faith 1:11).

In that same spirit, Church President Thomas S. Monson made a plea during general conference, a semiannual worldwide meeting, for more religious understanding: “I would encourage members of the Church wherever they may be to show kindness and respect for all people everywhere. The world in which we live is filled with diversity. We can and should demonstrate respect toward those whose beliefs differ from ours.” Latter-day Saints accept all sincere believers as equals in the pursuit of faith and in the great work of serving humanity.

Emphasizing God’s love for all people, not just those of one religion, President Dieter F. Uchtdorf of the First Presidency, the highest governing body of the Church, declared: “We honor and respect sincere souls from all religions, no matter where or when they lived, who have loved God, even without having the fulness of the gospel. We lift our voices in gratitude for their selflessness and courage. We embrace them as brothers and sisters, children of our Heavenly Father. … He hears the prayers of the humble and sincere of every nation, tongue, and people. He grants light to those who seek and honor Him and are willing to obey His commandments.”

The late Krister Stendahl, emeritus Lutheran Bishop of Stockholm and professor emeritus of Harvard Divinity School, established three rules for religious understanding: (1) When you are trying to understand another religion, you should ask the adherents of that religion and not its enemies; (2) don't compare your best to their worst; and (3) leave room for "holy envy" by finding elements in other faiths to emulate. These principles foster relationships between religions that build trust and lay the groundwork for charitable efforts.

The spiritual and physical needs of the world require goodwill and cooperation among different faiths. Each of them makes a valuable contribution to the larger community of believers. In the words of early Church apostle Orson F. Whitney, “God is using more than one people for the accomplishment of his great and marvelous work. The Latter-day Saints cannot do it all. It is too vast, too arduous, for any one people.” Thus, members of the Church do not view fellow believers around the world as adversaries or competitors, but as partners in the many causes for good in the world. For example, the Church has joined forces with Catholic Relief Services in a “collaboration of caring” that aids victims of famine and natural disaster. Furthermore, the Church worked with Islamic Relief Worldwide and the Islamic Society of Great Salt Lake to provide immediate humanitarian assistance in December 2004 to the tsunami-hit areas of Indonesia, Thailand and Sri Lanka.

It is important to note that interfaith cooperation does not require doctrinal compromise. Though the Church asserts its ecclesiastical independence and recognizes its doctrinal differences, this does not prevent it from partnering with other faiths in charitable projects. These efforts are based on universal values. A different interpretation of the atonement of Christ, for example, need not diminish the mandate of Christ to “love thy neighbor as thyself.” Therefore, it is necessary to maintain a separation between charitable efforts and doctrinal tenets, while at the same time sharing mutual concern for those in need. People of good faith do not need to have the exact same beliefs in order to accomplish great things in the service of their fellow human beings.

What my Muslim friends teach me

From my post on the Civil Religion blog:

Many years ago, while I was a college student, I was hired by a Muslim man to teach English to his daughter. We would studay at the kitchen table. Often while I was in their home the family would gather for prayer, prompted by a chime or clock in their home. The father would apologize for interrupting our studies to answer the call to prayer.

I didn’t mind. In fact, the first time I remember feeling ashamed that I had forgotten to pray that day. I bowed my head and said my prayer in the kitchen, while they knelt in the living room.

This family exemplified the best of devoted Muslims. They exuded goodness and fairness. They were kind to me.

My family in the 90’s lived in Bangkok, Thailand. We lived near a Muslim community. Many Muslims became our friends. Quite often we heard the call to prayer. It was soothing, even calming to know people were taking time from their day to remember God. Many times I would be prompted by the call to say my prayers.

As a Christian, I try to pray often. Life and schedules can get in the way from making time for quiet contemplation and prayer. If I apply Stendahl’s rule #3, I can say that I have “holy envy” for a Muslim’s devotion to God through prayer.

When I hear Muslim call to prayer, it often serves as a reminder to me: Did I remember to pray?

I am grateful for what my Muslim friends teach me about devotion and reverence for God.

St. Louis Post-Dispatch's 'Civil Religion'

The St. Louis Post-Dispatch has just launched a new blog titled Civil Religion and my co-blogger Dana King has been invited to join the conversation.

Here's what religion reporter Tim Townsend says in his lead-in.

Conversations about faith can get heated quickly. On this blog, we hope to keep the discussion provocative, but thoughtful. With that in mind, we've recruited a dozen members of our community -- from across the spectrum of faiths, ideologies, ages, races and professions -- who are thoughtful about their own beliefs, and we asked them to share those thoughts on Civil Religion.

Townsend further explains: 

Rousseau coined the term civil religion to describe the necessary basics of belief that keep a civilization together in accord with a social contract the civilization lives by. And while we certainly intend to discuss such beliefs on this blog, we also liked the name Civil Religion because it described the tenor of the conversation we hope to have here.

It is therefore fitting that Dana's first post is titled Stendahl's Rules.

Have you thought about how you can practice civil religion in your community?

What are you doing to join the on-line conversation?

Presenting our Beliefs in the Public Arena

Alan Wolfe of the Boisi Center for Religion and American Public Life recently invited Elder Clayton M.  Christensen, Area Authority, North America, Northeast, and a prominent Harvard Business School professor, to present a seminar on Mormons in American Politics.  Margaret Woolley Busse, a member of the Public Affairs Committee for Greater Boston, attended the conference, and has kindly agreed to share her learnings about how to present what we believe to the general public.

As I listened to Elder Christensen present on the the topic of “Mormons and Public Life,” (in the wake of the Romney campaign), I found both his themes and his methodology for delivering them were great examples of effectively communicating our beliefs in a public arena.  Below are the highlights:

The importance of being able to clearly explain why Mormons consider themselves Christian while others do not.

Elder Christensen succinctly explained our beliefs about the Apostasy and the subsequent Restoration, and in a very diplomatic but also uncompromising way, explained how other Christians tied themselves to tenets of the Nicean Creed and various subsequent Reformation ideas, while we adhere to what we believe to be 1st century Christianity.  If more Mormons could articulate this narrative effectively (but not combatively), it would greatly help us as we contend with those calling us non-Christian.

The importance of articulating the difference between being truly religious vs. using the banner of religion as a means to gain power, incite hatred, and invoke violence.

He gave examples of people who declare themselves religious and have garnered power by doing so, but their actions reflect anything but (Ralph Reed of the Christian Right, who turned out had siphoned millions of dollars away as part of the Jack Abramoff scandal; Newt Gingrich, who it turned out was having an extra-marital affair at the same time he was prosecuting the Monica Lewinsky case; and the Islamic extremist who masterminded the horrific elementary school hostage situation in Chechnya a few years ago, and who, as it turned out, didn't know much about Islam at all).

Very often academics, the media, and general conversationalists, refer to "religious people" to include both of the aforementioned types.  Elder Christensen rightly defined being "Christian" as simply someone who "[has] love one to another" (John 13:35) and as James says, “[visits] the fatherless and the widows in their affliction and [keeps] himself unspotted from the world" (James 1:27).  As an addendum to the first learning, these attributes are what identifies one as Christian, not specific doctrinal beliefs.

The strong argument for religion working alongside democracy

He told a story of a friend of his who was a Fulbright scholar from China that had come here to study American democracy.  He concluded that democracy here functioned so well because we have a strong religious foundation. Because Americans have, at least historically, attended churches and synagogues regularly, they were taught again and again the importance of abiding by a certain moral code.  If one did not, not only would the law punish, but more importantly, so would God.

It is thus voluntary adherence to religiously-based values that keeps society in line, rather than the enforcement of a strict penal code.  The Chinese scholar concluded that without this religious foundation that has now seeped through all elements of our culture, a state trying out democracy will fall into corruption, chaos, and quite possibly anarchy, as no citizen would feel compelled to abide by a moral code.  In short, religion should not be considered as irrelevant--and possibly harmful--to our government, as many would like to assert, but instead key to its very existence.

The real role our Church plays in public life

Our church is involved in true political activism because we focus so strongly on strengthening families, and the family is the unit of society where people learn to be good and contributing citizens.  He said when we teach in Relief Society and in Priesthood quorum how to strengthen our families, that is political activism.  When we hold Family Home Evening once a week in our homes, that is political activism.

The effectiveness of using stories that emphasize people’s commonalities

Elder Christensen used compelling stories to begin each of the points he made, which grabbed the audience's attention and built on commonalities.  For example, after he had briefly told the Joseph Smith story, Elder Christensen told a story of his own, where a fellow student at Oxford to whom he had enthusiastically given a Book of Mormon, had returned the book a day later, saying “This story at the beginning of the book—the one about this guy Joseph Smith? That should be put at the back—it is simply too unbelievable for anyone to continue reading!”

Well, this is in fact what everyone in the room was probably thinking, so it made people feel that Elder Christensen could understand their viewpoint.  He continues, “So I said to myself, well is it really so unbelievable? So I went to the Bible and found many examples of young boys being called as prophets—Samuel, David, Daniel,” etc.  In telling this story, he re-affirmed his own belief in the Joseph Smith, while being empathetic and reasonable.  A reminder that before I launch into an argument that may be off-putting for some, I should begin with a story that helps people get comfortable and builds on our commonalities.

Can you think of other people/times where people have effectively shared what they believe with those that believe differently?

If you haven't had a chance to read Alan Wolfe's article Mormons and Money, I would encourage you to do so.  It is quite good.  Note, however, it does require a payment.

Related articles/posts:
Richard Bushman's Pew Center Forum speech Mormonism and Politics:  Are they compatible?
President Thomas S. Monson -- working with others
President Gordon B. Hinckley -- Friend of the media
Public Affairs project:  Mormonism 101
Leaven in the lump

 

Offering our Hands

Today in Church I heard a profound statement by Brother Bob Hohman who has participated in our church’s efforts to help victims of the flooding in the St. Louis area of Fenton and Valley Park, both cities in my stake. Read more about the story here: Missionaries Help Protect Flooded Communities.

Brother Hohman said, in regards to sharing the gospel, “we must use our hearts, but we must also use our hands.”

This brother, with tears, then recounted his experience of the last week working beside our missionaries in yellow “Mormon Helping Hands” T -shirts. Because of the conspicuous yellow shirts, Brother Hohman was asked many times by community friends why the missionaries were there. He was able to say: “Because they care.”

Caring First -- that is how the Savior taught.

Then with more emotion this good brother said, “I wish everyday was Easter and everyday was Sunday.”

To commemorate Easter everyday, can we offer our hands "with" community friends?

In what ways have you been touched by working side by side with community friends?

How does this help you enjoy the fellowship of the community?

Learn more about the Mormon Helping Hands program by clicking here: Mormon Helping Hands

Caring First

I have been in training to sell furniture. I work for a company that believes building rapport should come before all else. It is taboo in our store to start the conversation asking, “What brings you in the store?” or “what are you looking for?” Rather we are to get to know our customers, ask them about their interests and build common ground.

Our trainer wrote on the board:

“People don’t care what you know, until they know you care.”

Wow, what gospel truth spoken in a very secular setting. It reminded me of how the Savior taught by ministering to people. He always showed genuine caring before he preached.

People wanted to know what the Savior knew, because they knew He cared.

Consider something I read by Renee Olson on blacklds.org. She shares an example of how caring can make the difference.

Can you relate an experience where real caring helped build common ground and friendship?

Getting involved in local government

In rifling through the myriad articles on Romney's campaign, I found this article Mormons & Politics:  Romney inspires LDS members to get involved in government to be among my favorites.

On March 31, 1978, President Kimball spoke to a group of Regional Representatives on political and governmental matters, saying "We urge our members to do their civic duty and to assume their responsibilities as citizens in seeking solutions to the problems which beset our cities and communities."

That was nearly 30 years ago.

I have wanted to become more involved, but it was never quite a priority.

One of the upshots of Romney's campaign (realizing that we weren't quite as well-liked as we thought we were) has been for members of our church to become more involved in our communities.

If we initially become involved "to clarify who we are and what we believe", as this article states, so be it.

Because, in time, whether we become a precinct officer, run for the school board, or participate in some other fashion, I believe we will not only have clarified who we are, we will have also made a difference.  Perhaps most importantly, we will find that we belong in a way that we hadn't thought possible.

Related posts:
President Thomas S. Monson -- on working with others
Tabernacle on Trial
Boston Globe Op-Ed:  Romney, Mormons and Me
What we can learn from Ann Romney

An "Opening the Door" Tradition

I suspect that anyone reading the article The Mormon Open-Door Tradition of Hosting Visitors will feel a surge of pride. Having attended the Olympics with my family in 2002, President Hinckley's conference address in which he said the church had joined together in a great expression of hospitality rang true.

So here's my question.

If it's a given that we are hospitable and generous to all that come within our midst, why is it that there are still so many that consider us to be clannish and closed?

As church members we are adept at welcoming dignitaries (whether heads of state or local planning boards) who seek us out.  We have been doing this well for over a hundred years, as the article points out.

But how do we do with people that don't seek us out?  My sense is that if we're not sought out, we don't seek, missionary work being the exception.  Remember the quiz -- of your last five social interactions, how many were with someone with whom the common ground is something other than religion?

With so many of us bruised by the negative PR in recent months, it is rather tempting to circle the wagons.  But what if we reframe what has happened saying -- we know we are good at hosting those who seek us out, now let's get good at seeking others out!

Why not look at the past year as a $100 million dollar boon, an expenditure that has brought the church out of obscurity so that the 'Lord can bless all the kindred of the earth' and ask ourselves what can we do to further lengthen this stride? 

Why not take our cue from Ammon, 'desiring to dwell amongst others and be their servant'?

In other words, why not add to our open-door tradition, an 'opening the door' tradition, one in which we pro-actively invite others into our home and hearts?

Thoughts?   

Related posts:

President Thomas S. Monson -- On Working with Others

Boston Globe Op-Ed:  Romney, Mormons and Me

Tabernacle on trial

What we can learn from Ann Romney

Do we need the community? 

Public Affairs Project: "Mormonism 101: A Secular Discussion" presented in town libraries

For those of our readers involved in Public Affairs, below is the first in a series of ideas for stake Public Affairs directors. Thank you to Jamie Larsen, the Boston Stake Director of Public Affairs, for her work on this project, as well as her willingness to share this best practice with other stakes and wards around the world.


Photo courtesy tilsonburg, istockphoto

Overview:
The Boston Massachusetts Stake is in the process of conducting informational meetings on Mormonism in our libraries. The goal is not to proselytize but put forth correct information about the faith in a neutral community setting that allows people to see Mormons up-close and ask questions. Our ward bishoprics have asked a husband and wife that live in the town of the library to prepare a Powerpoint presentation that gives an overview of the faith, our history and beliefs, and then conduct a Q & A at the end of the presentation. This is also not in anyway a political event, but with Mitt Romney’s presidential campaign, it has thrust Mormonism into the public spotlight in a way that has generated numerous questions from friends and neighbors. We are simply seeking to answer those questions.

Publicity:
Publicity is a challenging aspect of this project. We have put event information in the town newspapers, posted information on town event list-serves, posted flyers and asked members to hand out flyers or invite people who might be interested. We also contacted and invited local clergy and interfaith groups and asked, where appropriate, for them to pass along the information.

Outcomes so far:
We have conducted these discussions in two libraries so far. In Maynard , Massachusetts ten people from the community attended. Two were invited by members and the other eight came because of other publicity. One couple came because they like Mitt Romney and plan to vote for him and can’t figure out why his Mormonism is such as issue. They also said that everywhere they turn lately it feels like Mormonism keeps coming up: with Mitt, with this library seminar and the missionaries knocked on their door this week. They wondered if we were stalking them? Our presenter confirmed that we were (smile). Two years ago we also did a library presentation in Brookline , Massachusetts . Eight people from the community came.

The Goals:
1. Advertise the event widely. From a marketing perspective, maybe the biggest bang from this event is the hundreds of people that read about it in the newspaper.
2. It provides an opportunity to reach out to clergy groups in many towns to just introduce ourselves and begin taking part in community discussions on religion and participating in community service. We have let the PA representative find the contact information for clergy groups then pass it to the bishop to make the call introducing himself, explaining our goal with this library program, asking for suggestions and volunteering to help in future community programs.
3. It provides an opportunity to distribute correct information about the church and allows people to meet a real Mormon and hopefully begin to build relationships of trust.

The Big Obstacle:
We advertise that this is not a proselytizing event and we must keep our word. We have felt this is not the right event to have missionaries attend. We also don’t ask people for their contact information or pass out literature. We do think that giving out the presenters’ contact information if anyone has further questions is a good idea and announcing that our church meetings are open to the public is a good idea. In Maynard, some members who attended asked people for contact information so they could send the missionaries, we are going to try to avoid this in the future.

Feedback:
The Maynard presentation focused on living a contemporary Mormon life, reviewed various programs, and gave an overview of a typical day for a Mormon family. The presenters did an excellent job of using humor and keeping the presentation very lighthearted (very much their personalities). They did talk about polygamy and some of our beliefs and history. One gentleman said he wanted to hear much more about the church’s history.

Event Description:
We think this event description worked very well and advise using something similar:
Contemporary Mormonism 101 at Maynard Public Library

Phil and Julie Berry of Maynard will present “Contemporary Mormonism 101: A Secular Discussion” Thursday, January 31, at 7 pm at the Maynard Public Library, 77 Nason Street .

A frank discussion of what it means to be a Mormon – and raise a Mormon family – in the 21st Century, and how to separate fact from fiction in the national conversation about the LDS Church . Do Mormons think and vote alike? Why the restrictive dietary rules? Do Mormons still practice polygamy? How do Mormons explain their Christianity?

Neither a proselytizing nor political event; all questions welcome.

Phil Berry, software entrepreneur, and Julie Berry, children’s book author, have lived in Maynard for nearly seven years, and are the parents of four school-age sons. For more information, email Jamie Larsen at jahelar@hotmail.com.

President Thomas S. Monson -- on working with others

Here is a KYN gem from the new President of the Church, Thomas S. Monson, as seen on lds.org:

Responding to a reporter’s question about the Church’s openness in working with other churches and groups, President Monson said:

“We should not be sequestered in a little cage. We should eliminate the weakness of the one standing alone and substitute it with the strength of working together to make this a better world.”

“I believe in that spirit,” he said.

I believe it too.

Related posts:

Do we Need the Community?

Think Outside the Cultural Hall

Tabernacle on Trial

I read a very thorough and searching piece in the Wall Street Journal tackling Latter-day Saints' feelings about being in the spotlight because of Mitt Romney's run for president.

Read it here: Tabernacle on Trial

Do you feel like Marvin Perkins, quoted in the article, who says, "It seems like open season on Mormons"?

The good, bad and ugly has come out on us.

Some truths, half truth and out right lies -- so much, it can seem overwhelming.

With Romney's suspension of his campaign, does the spotlight dim down, even turn off?

Personally, I think perceptions remain unchanged, regardless.

Every good public relations professional will tell you:

Negative perceptions are driven by hearsay;

positive perceptions by experience.

We know that studies back this up. Overwhelmingly people who know Latter-day Saints have a favorable opinion.

Has this season been for Latter-day Saints a wake-up call?

If so, how do we respond? Is "know your neighbor" the right response?

How do we want people to come to know us?  Through hearsay or experience? What is the way to drive home our story, to tell who we are?

We want to hear your opinions.

Boston Globe Op-Ed: Romney, Mormons and Me

As I watched Romney's candidacy, I found myself alternately thrilled and not. The below op-ed is an attempt to sort and sift through my two minds. Some of you will no doubt disagree. I would love to hear why. Regardless, after you read (or skim) the piece, will you ask yourselves the questions below?

If we were to become better at combining our secular and spiritual lives, would Noah Feldman's NY Times article have been written? Would people have been so deeply uncomfortable with Romney's Mormon-ness? Would we have needed Romney to be so perfect?

As we practice marrying our two lives, I would look to kids in high school. Though this is a terribly difficult time as they daily ask themselves the question 'assimilate - de-assimilate?', I think you'll find that they maintain this balance remarkably well.

In fact why not put my hypothesis to a test.

Next time you are in a meeting with adults and youth (like Bishop's Youth Council), take the Know Your Neighbor quiz: Of the last five people you interacted with socially, how many in 5 do you have something in common with other than religion?

Though there are bound to be exceptions, especially within the Mormon corridor, odds are that the youth will score higher than the adults.

What are your thoughts?

President Gordon B. Hinckley -- Friend of the Media

Moregood Foundation has encouraged us to take opportunities in blogs and in chat rooms to talk about President Gordon B. Hinckley.

His passing is creating interest on the web.

So here is my remembrance about how he taught me to reach out to my neighbors:

You may remember President Hinckley’s announcement at General Conference in April 1996 that he would be on the CBS's 60 Minutes.

This was quite a big deal. Not too many Presidents of the Church have been on such a high profile show. Especially significant is that the reporter, Mike Wallace, was not known for being soft on those he interviews.

President Hinckley expressed his trepidation about being interviewed. He weighed carefully the invitation and decided to lean into the stiff winds of opportunity, as he put it, rather than hunker down and do nothing.

This was perfect timing for me. At the time, I was directing the media effort for an event for Bangkok, Thailand stake. I was not a media relations veteran in any sense of the word, and felt very inadequate. One press release I had sent was maliciously edited to poke fun at and malign our missionaries serving in Thailand.

It hurt.

I never wanted to work with the press again, because I feared doing more harm than good for the church. I feared being mis-quoted or caught off-guard. I felt particularly vulnerable because of my lack of experience.  Since I couldn’t control the outcome, I didn’t want to try anymore.

When I saw that President Hinckley was willing to take a risk to work with the media despite some concern for the outcome, I took great comfort. I decided I would not let a bad experience keep me from taking the opportunity to tell our story.

Good thing.

Since that time I have had wonderful experiences with the media. Many editors and reporters have become close friends of mine. We know that Mike Wallace became a close friend of President Hinckley.

President Hinckley reminded me that reporters and editors are real people too. We can tend to paint them with a broad brush, characterizing them as only wanting to create a sensational story without interest for the truth. I have found this is most often not the case.

President Hinckley taught me not to fear my neighbor, but to take a risk and reach out.

So many people confirm that President Hinckley was by nature a shy man. I believe he overcame any natural shyness, in part, by his love and devotion to God and His children.

I have been blessed a hundred fold for his example.

My heart is full, I will miss this great leader, but his example will be my beacon forever.

(photo at right: President Hinckley was often interviewed by CNN's Larry King)

Treasure Hunting with Friends

Photo from Flickr.com

I heard a touching testimony in sacrament meeting a couple months ago, and I'd like to share it with you.

Nick Miller is a first-year graduate student in the English department of Washington University in St. Louis, Missouri.  He has felt left out of opportunities to network with his colleagues, because he doesn’t join them when they go out to bars and engage in other activities which would make him uncomfortable.

He also bemoaned the fact that his life has many more demands than many of his single colleagues, since he is married with young children.

In an effort to reach out to his colleagues, he invited one of his colleagues and her husband to his home for dinner. His guests expressed that they sympathize with his dislike of social activities that take them away from their family. They explored ways they would like to network, and this led to an invitation to attend a family home evening in the Miller’s home.

Nick said the experience taught him that, while he does not have the time or freedom his colleagues have, he does have things of value that can build common ground.   

Do you sometimes feel like Nick did? What do you have of value that others might also be looking for and treasure?

Inviting someone to dinner, as Nick did, is a wonderful way to get to know your neighbour.